“I’ve taken up photography because it’s the only hobby where you can shoot people and cut their heads off without going to jail.”ĥ0. “If you can read this with ease you are twisted! And have an awesome talent! This is both backwards and upside down! Like and share if you can read this!”Ĥ9. “Sometimes you just want to throw fertilizer at people so they grow up!”Ĥ8. “I hate it when im singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.”Ĥ7. “How to stop time: Kiss How to travel in time: Read How to escape time: Music How to feel time: Write How to waste time: Social media”Ĥ6. “If stress burned calories I’d be a super model…”Ĥ5. Spider unless you pay rent… …you can’t live in my house.”Ĥ4. They travel up your spine, into your brain, and that’s where shitty ideas come from.”Ĥ3. I prefer the term mentally hilarious.” Best New Funny Jokes Minions Quotes Ideas, Humor ImagesĤ1. “Brains are awesome I wish everybody had one.”Ĥ0. “The biggest lie I tell myself is “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”ģ9. “It’s ok to talk to yourself, it’s even ok to answer yourself… But when you ask yourself to repeat what you just said – you have a problem!”ģ8. The fatter they get, the thinner I look!”ģ7. “My diet plan: Make all of my friend’s cupcakes. “Being able to respond with sarcasm within seconds of a stupid question is a sign of a healthy brain.”ģ6. “Where does all my money go? It’s like, hocus pocus I’m brokus”ģ5. How about a nice compliment to lift my spirits? Your eyesight is perfect.”ģ4. “I just saw myself in the mirror naked and I look like hell. “That awkward moment when you think you do a silent fart and it comes out like a machine gun.”ģ3. “Of course women don’t work as hard as men… They get it right the first time.”ģ2. So far I’ve finished two bags of M & Ms and a chocolate cake I feel better already.” Best Very Funny minions Quotes | Minions funny, Humor messagesģ1. “My therapist told me: the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. What if you go missing? How can we find you if you look like beyonce on Facebook, and Chewbacca in person.”ģ0. “Fight for you respect you include you encourage you need you deserve you”Ģ9. “Good friends help you to find important things when you have lost them… your smile, your hope, and your courage.”Ģ8. “Every day I arrive at work with good intentions and a great attitude. “My fashion style is called ‘Whatever the hell still fits me’”Ģ5. “If people are talking about you behind your back, then just fart!”Ģ4. “Some of the best moments in life are the ones you can’t tell anyone about.”Ģ3. But remember to throw the flower pot with it.”Ģ2. “Why do they call it “Beauty sleep” when you wake up looking like a troll!” Best Minions Quotes & Humor images | Minions funny, Humor messagesĢ1. Remind yourself that you wouldn’t look good in prison stripes and just smile at the dumbass and walk away.”Ģ0. “Sometimes you just have to close your eyes. “The best feeling is waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you still have hours to sleep.”ġ9. “Warning: Bitch switch has been activated. “Wouldn’t it be so great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free… and three sizes smaller?”ġ6. “Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera.”ġ5. “Dear Easter bunny, this year could you please fill my eggs with health and happiness and deliver them to everyone that I love.
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